As a result, you’re sending excessive texts to him to grab his attention and to try to validate your presence in his life. A lot of us have been there and done that. And we somehow know the cure to this obsession. To stop texting him obsessively, you have to find other activities to keep yourself engaged while giving yourself a break to figure out your emotions. Here are 6 ways you can stop texting a guy obsessively:
1. Think about the purpose of your texts
The habit of texting him too much might easily turn into a habit that can turn into an obsession that will be hard to break. Therefore, you should limit your texts per amount of texts you receive from him. The texts you send him shouldn’t outnumber his texts. Make sure that each text you send has a purpose and a solid reason. If you don’t find a reason, don’t send the text. This way you can have your behavior in control and can stop yourself from texting him obsessively. The more texts you send with no reply, you’re likely to look desperate in his eyes. Usually, this obsessive texting behavior is because you’re infatuated with him and want to do your utmost to keep him interested in you. While trying to reach this goal, your texting behavior might be turning into an obsession unconsciously which can be stopped only when you become aware of it.
2. Find something to do that makes you happy
To stop texting him obsessively, you should occupy yourself with doing something which makes you happy and enthusiastic. While texting him might give you temporary happiness, finding something meaningful to you will keep you happy in the long run. To stop yourself from obsessively texting him, you should set a goal that you would find immense meaning in its completion. Use the energy of that drive to text him to fuel your new set of success and make it a priority before him. While redirecting your energy and attention towards something else, try to do something for someone else as well. You can start a volunteer job, at a small charity, or visit the retirement house and play a game of chess with them. When you feel happy, loved, and appreciated, there will be no time to be spent over obsessively texting him.
3. Try to recognize what triggers you to obsessively text him
When the urge to text arises, you have to say to yourself STOP, sit down and think about it. Your compulsive behavior comes as a result of obsessive thoughts. Try to recognize the pattern which led you to grab your phone and start flooding him with texts. Deconstruct your behavioral pattern and understand what acts as a trigger to the obsession of texting him. Triggers can be of any kind as a result of:
Past traumatic experience; The feeling of loneliness; Anxiety; Fear of abandonment; Manipulative behavior, etc;
Once you understand the trigger, you can address it and find the cause which switches your behavior on impulse. You can deal with your triggers by:
Acknowledging them; Giving yourself some space; Locating the source; Seeking help;
To stop texting him, try deleting and blocking him from any platform on which you can contact him to set boundaries for yourself and not resort to stalking.
4. Engage in other activities
To stop texting him obsessively, find something which will keep you away from your phone and have no relationship to it whatsoever. When keeping your mind busy with other activities there is less time to think about him. The moment you get an urge to text him, use that energy to do something else. It can be a drawing, a painting, or any other big or small activity to spend your energy on. Try exercising by going out for a run, doing home exercise, doing yoga, or going to the gym. This will be a break from your usual routine, keeping your body and mind healthy. Yoga is something you can try to help yourself relax, and find some inner peace, and balance. It will help with harmonizing both your body and soul. Meditating is another activity that will help you stay calm and in control of your body and thoughts. When you’re writing the next text of 10 others that you already sent him, think about what else you would be doing that would benefit you. Find any activity which is better than staring obsessively at the phone, waiting for him to reach back.
5. Talk to friends and family
Your obsessive texting can be stopped by consulting with someone, a professional, a friend, or a family member. Talk to people you trust. When telling him of your actions and what your discovered triggers are, they might be able to see something you might have missed. Although they have their own opinions and advice to give you, you shouldn’t let their opinions entirely govern your thoughts and beliefs. You can still listen and find some comfort in their attempts to help you, which means they care and perhaps help you form your ideas for the next step. Venting your emotions can be a very helpful thing in this situation. A second, third, or fourth perspective can shift yours as well. When words are said, put out, and your thoughts are verbally expressed, that can create a sense of presence and truth. That then can help you see your behavior from another perspective and comprehend it from a different angle.
6. Know that you are not alone
To stop texting him obsessively, you need to understand the root of the cause which is pushing you to react this way. Usually, insecure attachment-style personalities are prone to adapting obsessive behavior because of fear of abandonment and rejection. Thus, you need to reassure yourself that you aren’t alone and you have other friends and family around you. Also, you might just be projecting your insecurities into his actions. When this attachment is starting to affect your health, you should seek help from a professional to get your emotions in control. To stop obsessively texting, you should try to break away from your routine because it is constantly leading to the same result that you’re trying to avoid. Understand that you’re not alone if this guy leaves. You don’t have to go over the top to make a person stay if that person already wants to stay. You’re not alone in this, you’re heard.
Give yourself a chance by using self-help resources to better understand yourself
The greatness of today’s digital world is that you can find as many resources as you need in seconds and a lot of them for free. Not only can you keep yourself occupied and distracted from texting him, but also use it for self-improvement purposes. Although self-diagnosis isn’t recommended, you might want to get an insight into the behavior and thoughts you have been displaying and resonate with other people too. – Mindset app. Ranks first in Korea’s wellness apps as it invites the audience to join the journey of their favorite celebrities. They share their experiences as humans and struggle with mental health and mundane situations. Their stories are personal and have never been shared before. There is no filter and advice from their own experience. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*uck – Mark Manson It is a self-help book that helps you realize that you need to be more selective of the things you care about. It will help understand why you must go through pain to achieve success and find happiness and strength in solving your problems. Although this book is about balancing family, life, and career, you will be able to extract something which can help you determine why you should stop texting him obsessively. Mental Health Online This is a place where you can get free services that will help you with your mental distress, identify your needs, and the best way to address them. The website is a trusted source established by Australia’s Federal Department of Health. Depending on your choice, you can seek professional help as well. The numerous programs offered rank from social anxiety, and depression programs to obsessive-compulsive disorder(OCD) programs. Thus, when trying to stop obsessively texting him, try to spend that energy on self-empowerment and improvement. This will help you be content with who you are as an individual and grow for the better. Texting Beyond Basics: Electrified – Callisto Adams A clear, well-written, and informative book that unveils unsaid things about texting throughout dating and relationships. It elaborates on issues such as the weight of a single word, the importance of presence (even if it is virtual), and the way to find confidence within. It can help you comprehend the importance of texting, the proper ways of communicating, and ways to improve yourself in this aspect. Matthew Hussey Is a dating coach which will help clarify what you’re feeling and how to deal with it. There are many programs he offers that help individuals transform their lives inside out. Also, he owns a youtube channel in which he gives advice for free on relationships, the action, and reaction one might have towards certain signs, situations, and texts. Love, Callisto
