“He left me for someone else, know that?” You may have broken up not too long ago, and he is already with someone else. What should you do if your partner left you for someone else? You may be clouded with thoughts like “I thought we were in love?” or insecure ideas about why you are not enough for him. But, it is only a matter of time before you realize you are not alone. Lots of women around the world go through this feeling. Being the perfect girlfriend or wife does not guarantee a happy, long-lasting relationship.
Why Did He Leave Me For Someone Else?
Why did he leave me for a new woman? There might be dozens of reasons why he left you for a new person. Yet, many of those reasons have to do with his problems. If a guy left you for a new person, it doesn’t mean you do not deserve love. A breakup can bring up feelings of doubt about one’s appearance. You can become insecure about your capability to be a good girlfriend. It is okay to grieve, but don’t get lost in sadness. That will only lead to depression. Asking your ex why he left is a form of closure you may want. Getting closure is essential to move on. Yet, sometimes you are better off not hearing his reason for leaving you. He might not even be aware of his internal issues and so project the blame on you.
What Do You Do When Someone Leaves You for Someone Else?
What do you do when your partner leaves you for someone else? Getting over a breakup isn’t an easy task. Feelings of pain and sad emotions are inevitable. Yet, taking time for yourself and focusing on your needs is essential.
Learn to move on
Such a difficult but necessary thing to do when your guy leaves you for someone else. You may have been happy with him at one point, but now that your stint as his girlfriend is over, it is time to move on. Control the urge to sulk in regret and stop waiting for him to come back. Sometimes in these situations, it is easy to make irrational decisions. It is crucial to remember that the right person would not treat you this way and that there is still hope. Until you realize that you still have a life outside of the failed relationship, you won’t heal.
What Should You Not Do?
Confront his new partner
Confronting his new partner is not the way to go. The embarrassment you will feel can cause you to become even more depressed. Yes, you’re angry and emotional, especially if he cheated and she knew about you. Yet, she did not commit to being faithful to you. The only person you should have confronted was him.
Self-blame
It is easy to blame yourself for your boyfriend breaking up with you. A lot of women blame themselves because of how manipulative he is. He acted like you were the problem. But, in fact, he was the problem or an equal contributor. “What did I do for him to leave?” “Am I not pretty enough?” insecurities tend to cloud the mind when relationships end. You must get out of your head because, most times, the problem is not you. “Why did he leave me for another woman?” The fact is that he left you. You need to reach the level of acceptance in the grieving phase. That is the only way you would be able to get over your guy dumping you. (Read the dumpers regret timeline)
Try to make him jealous
You may want to do everything you can to get him back. But focusing on making him jealous may not be the best solution. To heal from a breakup can take a long time. The urge to get with another person to make him return can be tempting. Yet, jumping into a relationship to spite someone is not healthy. You can also be hurting the person you moved on with. Do you still have feelings for your ex even though he left you for someone else? Dating right away is not the best course of action. Yet, note that this method to get your ex back can be effective. It works well, especially if your guy still has feelings for you. Still, the chances of him cheating or leaving you for someone else for the second time are high.
How Do You Move On When He Left You For Someone Else?
No one wants to feel alone. Moving on from being with someone you love can be challenging. It’s hard to go from being with your ex all the time to keeping your distance. It is even more difficult if your ex’s family has treated you well. Breaking up with someone is breaking up with their whole family and the life you both had. It takes time to process this new change, especially if it is a long-term relationship. Yet, it is essential to move on. Dwelling in your sorrows for the rest of your life is not practical. According to Mental Health Matters, there are five stages of grief when it comes to breakups. “They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.” Many people go through it without even noticing. The period for each stage depends on you and how bad the situation that led to the breakup was. So what can you do to help you move from denial to acceptance? Here are a few things you can do to help you move on from your ex.
Focus on your goals
There must have been things you wanted to do other than finding a lifelong partner. Whether it be your career or getting your body back in shape, it helps to put your effort into other things. Keeping occupied can help you ease the pain of a breakup. You could pick up a new hobby like hiking or knitting. Use your job as a distraction, especially if it is something you love doing.
Find someone new
Although this is not ideal for some, others heal fast and want to return to the dating world. Dating other people can be a distraction to get over your ex leaving. Yet, you mustn’t string someone along as a means to get back together with your ex. Date a person you find a real connection with, and don’t use him as a rebound. This would only hurt you both in the end.
Vent to a friend
Sometimes talking to a friend you trust who gives good advice is what you may need to help get over your ex. Getting an outside perspective on things can make a difference. Talk to your closest friends about what you think went wrong. Hearing what they feel about the matter may help clarify things for you. Yet, take this advice with a pinch of salt. Sometimes even your closest friends are not aware of the situation. Thus the guidance they’ll give may not be the best. Also, sometimes even your closest friends may have hidden agendas.
Talk to a therapist
Sometimes seeing a professional can work better than going to a friend. You get good advice and feel less judgement. Ignore the taboo about therapists. Getting help or even advice is okay and mentally healthy. Try one session with a five-star therapist, and you may look forward to more.
No contact with Ex
Having no contact with your ex-boyfriend is one of the best ways to get over him. The term “out of sight, out of mind) is quite relevant here. Keeping contact with your ex when he left you for someone else can stir up drama and negative emotions. And that you do not need. If you have children together, then no contact may not be the best solution. You both need to put your rivalry aside and focus on your kids.
Go out with friends
According to Jane Greer from everydayhealth.com, “Research shows that people who use humor to fight stress also feel less lonely and more positive about themselves. In fact, these simple outings will “enhance your feelings of being taken care of and supported.” After a breakup, friends tend to be the ones to comfort you and reassure you that it is better that way. Getting all glammed up and out of the house is one of the things girls find comfort in doing. Studies have proven that this action helps take your mind off all the sadness so you can enjoy the moment.
Get closure from your ex
Getting closure can be risky as it often leads to make-up sex and more heartbreak. Yet, it is beneficial in the moving-on process. Talking about what happened and its reasons can help you put the relationship in the past. Then you’ll be able to focus on the future. For girls especially, closure is something needed. It silences overthinking so you can move forward in life.
Will his New Relationship Last?
My ex left me for someone else. How will I know if his new relationship will last? It is impossible to tell if his new relationship will last. Did your ex leave you for someone else right away? He may have been already seeing the person without your knowledge, or he rushed into it as a way to hurt you. Either way, the possibility of the relationship being long-lasting isn’t high. According to Very Well Minded, “Rebound relationships typically last between one month and a year, and commonly struggle to last past the initial infatuation period. They are often not based on deep compatibility, so differences can start to strain the connection.” A relationship like that has its basis in lies. If your ex cheated on you, what are the chances that he wouldn’t do it in a relationship with another girl? Even if his intentions are not to cheat, that thought will always be in his new partner’s mind. She will know of his capability to cheat. Yet, putting your energy into your ex and his new relationships would only drive you crazy. Basing your life on a maybe is not the best way to get over your ex leaving you for someone else. Why would you want to get back together with a guy who broke it off with you for someone else? How do you know he won’t do it again? Yes, keep in mind that people change. Yet, if there is no effort to show potential change, you should reconsider taking your ex back. The past can affect the future no matter how long ago it was.
What if He Wants Me Back?
What if he wants me back? And do you want to take him back? When a guy thinks he can get you back anytime he wants, he may not feel the need to respect you or your wishes. Is he the one that did wrong and then broke up with you afterward? Then you should consider whether you want to take him back. Take control of the situation. Your ex should know that it is not easy to return to you. This is so that he would think twice about leaving you for someone else next time. If he is pushing to get back with you, remaining friends until you build that trust may be the right thing to do. You deserve more than being the girl he can fall back on and cheat on over and over again. When a guy knows you are forgiving, he would not see the point of doing better. If your boyfriend left you for someone else, this could mean that he is into looks and not personality. That’s especially true if the relationship was not on the rocks because of you. Thus, there is no way to tell if he would repeat his old ways.
Do exes come back if they left you for someone else?
Do exes come back if they left you for a new person? The possibility of an ex returning after breaking up with you is pretty high, as exes always reconnect. Still, that doesn’t mean there will be smooth sailing after getting together. So tread with caution if he wants to get back with you. Don’t set yourself up for more heartbreak.
