Sometimes, the first date is the hardest of them all because you have that need like you need to figure out everything. You might feel and think that everything went great but that might be from your perspective. That’s why you need at least a couple of hours to zone out from those overwhelming emotions. After doing it then you can follow a few tips and use some text samples, to get a second date.

Before choosing which flirty texts to use, reflect a bit on your first date!

There are a few things that you need to reflect on before using the flirt texts after the first date. First, check if your and his body language matched.  This will help you know more if he was just being friendly if he is just a player, or really interested in you. Secondly, reflect on how the conversation went, whether you or he carried it on more. What type of questions did he ask, whether he was interested to know more about you or know? Based on all the answers you got, you will choose the texts and tips below that are suitable to your situation.

1. Flirty texts to ensure that you’re interested in him

Even in the dating world, no one can express their feelings how they want to. You might feel a lot but don’t know how to put feelings into words. Yet, if you couldn’t show him how you felt during the first date, try to flirt with him over text the next few days. You can even text that night and say something like: “Tonight was quite cool and magical. Can’t wait for our next encounter.” “Last night was fun. I bet we want to do it again.” More precisely, you don’t need to make him feel uncomfortable. You just need to keep the ball rolling.

2. Flirty texts to connect you more emotionally

When you’re not dating exclusively, sending flirty texts might be risky. Especially when you did not know one another or you were just friends with benefits. In this case, what type of text you send has a vast impact because it will either help you progress or not. It’s never about what you are saying but the way you’re constructing and delivering it. You should subtly flirt and boost his confidence and make him seen and valued. “I was just watching “The New Girl” and Schmidt’s character reminded me of you. Well, you’re 1000X cuter.” “I thought I was a good listener. But, god damn it, you get the first place.”

3. Flirty texts to raise your chemistry

You don’t need to sext to be flirtatious and raise your chemistry. To be more specific, you can use subtle ways of flirting that will evoke his feelings for you. “Today is windy and I am wearin’ your hoodie. Cuddling mode on.” “Just to let you know that face of yours could make billion of hearts burst from joy.” “Hey you, not so stranger anymore. Did you miss my voice yet?” “I went and bought the Corn Dog that you recommended. I must admit, your taste is 10/10.” Using these types of texts, you will make him think about you. This will evoke other feelings that he might have for you.

4. Flirty texts after the first date to make him chase you

Well, everybody needs a little chasing in the early stages of dating. When a guy wants you to chase him, he will act hot and cold and process things slowly. He might do it for different reasons: a personal previous trauma or because of his attachment style. Whatever the reason, flirty texts after the first date in this case will validate his feelings. Flirting and showing interest after the first date will give him a glimpse of who you are and what you think. Be playful and tease him a bit. Use your mystery. “Wanna know what I would do if I was by your side right now?” “I really wish I was in blank right now?” “Text what comes to your mind when you see my text…Go Go GO right now tell me.” “Can you guess what is making me smile right now?”

5. Flirty good morning/good night texts

One of the best things to do after a good first date is to send flirty good morning or good night texts. If you want to keep the ball rolling and show your interest, you should connect more with him. There is no better way to do it than to let him know that you’re thinking about him. “Heyyyy, sunshineeee… Hope you’re not having problems breathing since I am your oxygen now😅” “Holy crap. Do I get to say to you Good Morning today?” “Good night. Remember your life will be an adventure with me.”

6. Create a positive environment for him

If you were having a good time during the first date or he found it hard to express himself, you make the first move. In particular, if he has an anxious attachment style then he will be quickly attached to you but won’t know how to express it. Or if you too have an anxious attachment style then it’s better to work on it while you flirt over texting. You can do it by choosing a licensed therapist and finding out how you can improve your attachment style. As you work on yourself, you can send him these flirty texts after the first date to make him and you feel comfortable: “Our last conversation just made me feel very alive. Thank youuuu.” “I made some pie and is screaming your name: Anthonyy come and eat me.” “I heard you are a great runner, guess what? Me too. Wanna try?” So, you just need to mention little things that will connect you more and make you value each other’s presence. To know more about attachment styles and their impact on relationships, check what Mark Manson has to say about them.

7. Try to be flattery to some extent

The best first flirtatious text could be oriented toward compliments. Use your conversations during your first date or whatever makes him outstanding. If you are shy and don’t know how to flirt directly then just be yourself.  You can mention a few positive aspects of the date and what you might be looking forward to. “Your jokes were so on point today. Wanna teach me some more.” “I would love to know about your secret weapon: your calmness.” I need a few tips about it.” “I had a blast with you. You really have great energy.”

8. Continue to build up the physical attraction

Building up the sexual tension after the first date sometimes is a hard task. Yet, if you were close during the first date and you were flirting with one another, you should text him. Be flirty enough to keep that flame and spark alive.  Do not go overboard but you can use some sensual words to trigger him. “You have no idea the moment I see you the things I imagine to do.” “Today is a hard day at work. I can’t focus. Because of you.” “My heart is doing squats just by looking at your face.” “Can you not be this hot, sexy, and cute at the same time? My heart cannot take it.”

9. Differentiate being flirty from being thirsty

There is a fine line between being flirty with someone and acting thirsty. After the first date, you can be more flirty over text than before it but still, you should be careful. The way you flirt with him depends on his personality too. If he isn’t way too flirty like you are sometimes it may cause a lot of misunderstandings. Also, it might be a turn-off for him. Remember to mirror him and you’ll get an answer on how hard to flirt after the first date. If you want to know how to refect correctly and understand the differnece, you can wor with a relationship coach too. “I noticed that you were quite talented in cooking. What would you recommend me to make for dinner tonight?” “You’re an amazing tennis player. Wanna compete tomorrow at 8 am, Park Avenue Street? I’ll win for sure😛.” “Something crossed my mind, I thought it was a thought but no it’s you.”

10. Ask flirty questions

If you want to continue and keep the flame of the first date alive or want to spice things up, ask questions. Yet, avoid making generic questions or flirting out of the blue. That will feel weird and will have a negative impact on your relationship. Try to connect things that you have talked about earlier and ask questions about those. “You said you aren’t interested in someone’s past. But, do you want to know a secret?” “I was thinking.. What do you think the best date setting would be?” “You said that you didn’t believe in love at the first sight. But do you believe in love at second or third sight? Asking for a friend.” “If you would meet me again for the first time? What would attract you to me?”

What is a good flirty text message after a first date?

A good flirty text message after a first date is the one that makes him feel comfortable with you. It’s that simple and short text that helps you to grow the connection between you two. If the flirty text before the first date helps you to initiate a deep connection, the flirty text after the first date enforces it. ~Remember, that you don’t need to overdo yourself just to get his attention. You need to go step by step and be patient. ~Also, whatever flirty text message you want to send to him after the first date depends on your connection. If you were friends before, it is easier to craft that text.  That’s because you know how he would feel if you said to him something. You already know his likes, dislikes, and reactions. ~The perfect flirty text after the first date should be the one that allows him to be vulnerable. Flirting is good but if you don’t benefit anything from it then it will be pointless. Try to use subtle flirting and light humor to make him feel at home and not judged. Open your heart first to the extent that will make him see your true self.

Is the first date too soon to send flirty texts?

It cannot be defined whether using flirty texts in the earlier stages of dating is wrong or too soon. No, it isn’t too early. What might make it look awkward or uncomfortable is using inappropriate words to express your interest/attraction. Yet, if she has the personaity that doesn’t like to open up quickly or flirt then yes, sending it might be inappropriate. It all depends on your and his personality and how both of you perceive dating and attraction.

The Bottom Line

Sending flirty texts after the first date will either make it or break it. This means that you should be very careful about which words you want to choose to flirt with. Remember, that words are ambiguous and texts might be misleading most of the time. Try to create a connection during the date, ask as many questions as you can, and show who you are. Set your boundaries and don’t wish to be someone else just to get his attention. You’re okay, you are who you are. Send that flirty text message after the first date, just as you feel. Be original. Sincerely, Callisto

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