Texting him and not getting texts back for days is frustrating and makes you question if you are the problem, to begin with. No matter how much effort you put into your texts you’re still faced with the same deafening silence that makes your heart beat out of your chest. A guy won’t text back for the simplest reason starting from forgetting to the complexity of making sense of his own conflicted feelings about you. You’re not alone in this anymore. Let’s decipher his intentions together! Here are 11 reasons why guys don’t text back for days:
1. He is emotionally immature
Past relationships might have influenced his confidence negatively, which is why his behavior can be extreme, such as not texting back for days. Because he is easily swayed by emotions, he will act out of insecurities and use manipulation tactics to keep you in check. You are dealing with an emotionally immature man if:
He gets jealous easily;
Never disagrees with something you say;
Refuses to talk to you if you said something he didn’t like;
He is highly defensive;
A guy won’t text back for days because you might have hurt him or made him mad, choosing to stay away for some time to cool off, or to make you chase him a bit.
2. You might be coming on too strong
Sometimes, when you click with a guy, enthusiasm follows suit which might make him uncomfortable and it makes you come a bit too strong. Unintentionally, your actions might be interpreted as desperate and needy for his attention, making him not text you back for days. The strong energy and emotions might have overwhelmed him and he is trying to create a gap between you two so that he can feel more comfortable. Keep in mind that you should keep your way of expressing real, in check, and balanced, otherwise they might not text back for days, if at all.
3. He is momentarily occupied with something else
A guy doesn’t text back for days because he might be occupied with something that distracts him from texting or even thinking of you. You can’t expect him to change his behavior for you instantly when you have just met and there is not much going on. If you have been together for some time and have established exclusivity, you should address his texting response. Otherwise, if it’s the early stages of getting to know one another, it’s normal for people to not text every day.
4. You aren’t a priority of his
A guy won’t text back for days because you’re not on his top priority list. If this is just the talking stages, this behavior and way of thinking are expected from both of you. When a guy doesn’t text back for days his attention could be directed elsewhere, affecting his response time, and keeping him from prioritizing texting you for a while. You should redefine your expectations by the current situation you’re in, to avoid disappointment and potential heartbreak.
5. Your last texts didn’t give him much to say
Guys tend to not text back for days because of the content of your texts. They can be dry texts or some banter that he doesn’t feel the need to respond to. Thus, if your texts aren’t specific and purposeful, it’s likely that he won’t text back because your texts don’t require anything specific from him. To make a guy text you back, you should create funny, interesting, and flirty texts to keep your conversations interesting. Because of the lack of creativity and information in your texts, he will not know what to say to keep the conversation going. Thus choosing to not text back for days until one of you has something else to say.
6. He isn’t in a rush to get into a relationship
Taking things slow and steady is what he intends to do, hence, he doesn’t text back for days. He is trying to build your relationship at a slow and steady pace. When you’re at the beginning of dating, he might be trying to keep a safe space for both of you so that if you don’t click well, you can easily distance yourself from each other. Just like you might be testing him, he might be seeing if you have chemistry together and if you share the same morals, values, and expectations but slowly and steadily. A guy doesn’t text back for days if he isn’t trying to rush into a relationship blindly, without getting to know you first and contemplating a long-term relationship together.
7. He forgot about you
Your text might have not been as memorable as you thought, or he’s not that much into you resulting in him not texting back for days. He might have just forgotten to get back to you, and after so much time has passed he finds it strange to answer. A guy won’t text back for days because he started losing interest and is trying to hint at it. If he likes you, truly, he wouldn’t forget about the text you sent him because you’d be in his mind at some point.
8. He thinks you’ve lost interest
Because of your lack of engagement and response time, he will be left with the impression that you aren’t interested in him anymore, hence why he doesn’t text back for days. If he feels that his feelings aren’t being reciprocated, he will pull away as he doesn’t want to waste time on something that won’t work. When a guy doesn’t text you back for days it can be because your behavior, unintentionally, made him think that he was disturbing you. You might have shown dismissive behavior for some time, his way of recovering from it can be an unwillingness to text back.
9. He’s playing hard to get
A guy won’t text back for days because he is trying to make you do the chasing and put in more effort in the relationship. This will give him the upper hand and a bit of power since he isn’t the one to invest all of his time and feelings in you. He could be using delayed text backs as a strategy to pull you into his game and manipulate you into being the pursuer. So consider your expectations and what this relationship is to you, and whether pursuing it intensively is something you’re ready to do.
10. He’s fooling around
Since he doesn’t show consistency in his texting behavior, he might be just fooling around when he has time. If this behavior has been happening for some time, then it’s likely he is just using you to spend his free time with or other personal interests. Guys don’t text back for days if they are just looking for someone to satisfy their needs. It would be too much effort for a player to text you every day.
11. He is on a trip
Work trips or just trips, in general, can be another reason why he doesn’t text back for days. He could be focused on his tasks required to be done within the given timeframe, or he could be exploring and ‘running’ around the place he’s at. He might not text back for days since he just wants to have a great time without the disturbance of the outside or telephone world. If you are already in that part of the relationship where sharing plans is okay, you shouldn’t overreact since he already informed you of his departure. Let him have fun or work done!
Should I double-text him when he hasn’t texted back for days?
Well, this is a double-edged sword. It can have positive effects as much as it can be negative. But it does have to do with the phase of your relationship as well. If you are just getting to know each other, then sending multiple texts one after the other wouldn’t be recommended. That’s because you haven’t established a foundation for your relationship yet, and even your expectations aren’t clearly defined. If you have been talking for some time, and even established exclusivity, double texting is a bit more acceptable, that too within limitations. – If you’re in the early stages of dating, try to avoid double-texting when he doesn’t text you back for days. When not much is established and you’re just getting to know each other, flooding him with double texts will scare him off, and make you look clingy. You should be careful not to come off as too strong, as that will negatively impact your relationship with him. Since you are in the beginning and he hasn’t texted you back for days, you can send him only one follow-up, and that’s it. Though, be prepared for the situation to repeat itself. Some double texts you can send to him include, – “Hey, haven’t heard back from you in a while. I just wanted to make sure everything’s okay.” – “Is everything alright?” If you still don’t receive any text, you should delete his contact and cut things off because his display of behavior shows a lack of interest. – You can double-text him if you’ve been in a relationship for some time. It is unusual to go days without texting your partner, be that your boyfriend or husband. If your texts aren’t being addressed, there is something wrong and you should consult with your partner. You can double-text him if it is something urgent that you need immediate assistance with, or if you’re feeling concerned at the moment. This isn’t something that you should sweep under the rug if it has never happened before. Whenever you get in contact with him, confront him and let him know of your feelings. Here are some double texts you can send your partner: – “Hey babe, still waiting for a reply from you. Are you okay?” – “Whenever you check your phone, please call me first.” – ”I don’t know what’s going on, but I’d appreciate you replying.” – “Let me know when you get this text, I’m getting worried. This is unusual of you.” Try not to get angry or jump to conclusions without hearing his side of the story as well, as impossible as it can feel.
Bottom line: I don’t want to wait days for a text from him
Guys won’t text back for days because the lack of interest and initial attraction has already started to decrease and he doesn’t feel comfortable letting you know of his change of feelings. Because he might not be planning to build a relationship with you is why you go days without texts from him. He’s just keeping you in his loop. However, your texting skills and content might be what is making him not text you back for days, since they’re dry responses or being interpreted as clingy behavior. As many factors might influence him to not text you back for days, you shouldn’t just wait by the phone and fall into desperation. You should try adopting healthy behavior which will make you happy and that can’t be shaken when undesirable situations occur. It’s normal to feel puzzled and confused, or even sad. Reaching out to someone who can help will give you a hand in managing the situation better. Don’t let your joy and smile be dependent on someone you just met. Keep your values and boundaries respected. If he doesn’t respect them, you can let him go. Love, Callisto
